| GAME OVER FOR MILTON BRADLEY CUBS SUSPEND NUTTY OUTFIELDER FOR REMAINDER OF 2009   
(9/20/09) GM Jim Hendry had enough of Bradley after he was short with reporters on Sept. 17, and gave some less-than-flattering comments about his Cubs experience in 2009 to the Daily Herald. Now Hendry is reportedly looking to unload the $10 million annual contract for 2 years to the first team or garage sale that will take him. When asked whether he has enjoyed being with the Cubs, Bradley - the guy who wanted so desperately to come here - replied, "Not really. "It's just not a positive environment. I need a stable, healthy, enjoyable environment. There's too many people everywhere in your face with a microphone asking the same questions repeatedly. Everything is just bashing you. You got out there and you play harder than anybody on the field and never get credit for it. It's just negativity. And you understand why they haven't won in 100 years here, because it's negative. It's what it is." Well, how positive can it be when the team goes from 97 wins last year and 2 straight division championships, gets you for the purpose of improving themselves in the playoffs, and you're basically out of the playoff hunt by the time September rolls around? Oh, and I know the real reason they haven't won in 100 years. Because they're stupid enough to overpay to sign losers and miscreants like YOU! It's not totally your fault that the Cubs have gone belly up in 2009, but you were supposed to be one of the missing pieces on this team, and instead your offense and your knowledge of how many outs there were just went missing. You've never won anything and you never will, and if the Cubs keep going after fools like you, the next 100 years won't be much better.
¡ADIÓS, EL GORDO! 
WHITE SOX CUT BARTOLO COLÓN IF HE WASN'T SO HARD TO MISS, YOU WOULD NEVER HAVE KNOWN HE WAS HERE.
SOX TRADE VETERANS THOME AND CONTRERAS THANKS, JIM 
(9/1/09) GO AWAY, JOSE BUT THANKS FOR JUNE 2005-JULY 2006
BIG LA- Z 
(8-17-09) The Cubs' $91 million-dollar arm admits his failure to prepare his body for the rigors of a baseball season. Like the fact that he has a gut and has been on the disabled list a couple times already this season for running to first base and over swinging during batting practice didn't tell us that already.
PERFECT BUEHRLE LEFTY THROWS 18TH PERFECT GAME IN MLB HISTORY AND 2ND EVER FOR SOX UPDATE: HAS 1 WIN SINCE! 
The constant cornerstone of the White Sox starting rotation since 2001 retired the Tampa Bay Rays, one of the best hitting teams in all of baseball, in order: 27 up, 27 down. Not that players or even fans necessarily think about these things during a player's career, but this should solidify the fact that Mark Buehrle will be the last Sox player to wear No. 56. He has over 100 wins for the team. He has 2 no-hitters including the July 23rd "perfecto." He has a World Series ring where he recorded a save in the marathon 14-inning Game 3. He's been on three playoff teams thus far. The only thing he hasn't done is win 20 games or a Cy Young Award. As far as I'm concerned, he belongs on the left field wall at U.S. Cellular Field. Maybe move Billy Pierce over for Buehrle so he can be pictured at the spot where DeWayne Wise made the miraculous perfect game-saving catch.
THE CUBS TO FILE FOR BANKRUPTCY? 
A brief filing of Chapter 11 could aid in the long awaited sale of the team. I don't claim to fully understand the bankruptcy laws, but this seems like an abuse of them. Bankruptcy to me would be for people who have bills they currently can't pay, not for companies that virtually print money trying to avoid bills they'd rather not pay. What liabilities are they trying to bypass that are weighing them down so significantly? Even with the sale, if Misters Ricketts or Utay can afford $900 million for the team and Wrigley Field, they can also afford these other bills. While the Cubs are bankrupt in championships for the last 101 years, they have plenty of assets to pay their damn bills!
GUILTY!   
NY TIMES REPORTS FORMER CUBS SLUGGER SAMMY SOSA ONE OF THE 104 NAMES ON THE POSITIVE LIST IN MLB'S FIRST DRUG TEST IN 2003 
Sosa always claimed to take Flintstones Vitamins when asked about his fuller figure and bigger numbers. That might not have not been such a great defense afterall. NO HALL OF FAME FOR YOU!
HE'S JUST MANNY BEING SUSPENDED 
THE DODGERS SLUGGER WAS SUSPENDED 50 GAMES FOR A POSITIVE DRUG TEST. RAMIREZ TESTED POSITIVE FOR HCG, A FEMALE FERTILITY TREATMENT. HE IS ELEGIBLE TO RETURN AROUND JULY 3, BUT HE MAY GO ON MATERNITY LEAVE AT THAT POINT. | | ELIMINATION NUMBERS 
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NO PLAYOFFS FOR YOU, CHICAGO!
WHITE SOX SHUT-OUT-O-METER THE OFFENSE THAT IS GUARANTEED TO HIT HAS BEEN SHUT OUT MANY TIMES THIS SEASON. KEEP TRACK OF EXACTLY HOW MANY RIGHT HERE. 12
SOX WIN SEASON SERIES 4-2 2009 CROSSTOWN SERIES, RD 2 @ THE CELL  VS GAME 1- CUBS WIN HOME RUN DERBY BECAUSE THEY HIT THEM WITH RUNNERS ON DESPITE SOX COMEBACK IN 8TH, CUBS HANG ON 5-4. GAME 2-BECKHAM SINGLES TO GIVE SOX WALK OFF WIN IN BACK-&-FORTH GAME, 8-7. GAME 3-SOX OFFENSE BEATS UP ERRATIC BIG Z & MORE JOHN DANKS ADDED TO A COUPLE PERFECT INNINGS FOR SCOTT LINEBRINK IN A 6-0 SOX WIN. 2009 CROSSTOWN SERIES, RD 1 @ THE URINAL GAME 1-CLUTCH BECKHAM, GOOD TORRES & SORIANO'S "DEFENSE" KEY SOX 5-0 WIN (RESCHEDULED GAME FROM 6/16 RAIN OUT) GAME 2- A LITTLE LONG BALL, A LITTLE SMALL BALL & A LOT OF JOHN DANKS. SOX CRUISE 4-1. GAME 3-CRAP LINEBRINK RUINS FLOYD OUTING; LEE AND SOTO WAKE UP; CUBS COMEBACK TO WIN 6-5.
RICKETTS FAMILY TO OWN RICKETY TEAM THAT PLAYS IN RICKETY STADIUM. PERFECT MATCH! SALE PENDING MLB OWNER APPROVAL. SHOULD BE FINAL NOV. 1. GOOD LUCK!
PEAVY SOLID IN 1st REHAB START, SHAKY IN 2nd, GREAT IN 3rd, STRUCK ON ELBOW IN 4th Reluctant righty finally comes to Windy City after giving his okay minutes before July 31 trade deadline. Sox hope he'll come back from right ankle injury in August. He threw well on August 13, for the Charlotte Knights. Not so much on August 18, but he improved greatly on August 24, before leaving early after being hit by a batted ball on the elbow on August 29. Now he needs to get some tests done to see if his pitching arm is okay after the incident. He can't get here soon enough with "Missing Link" Colon still on the roster and "Old Man" Contreras traded to Colorado. It's so bad that Freddy Garcia is still in the rotation. Where's "El Duque?" It may already be too late! This 2010 roster looks great, though! Doesn't get me playoff tickets, unfortunately.
GEOVANY SOTO 2008 NL TOP ROOKIE 2009 WBC POT USER CHICAGO CUBS CATCHER GEOVANY SOTO TESTED POSITIVE FOR MARIJUANA WHILE PLAYING FOR PUERTO RICO DURING THE WORLD BASEBALL CLASSIC THIS PAST MARCH. HE'S SUSPENDED FROM INTERNATIONAL COMPETITION FOR 2 YEARS (LIKE THERE IS ANY INTERNATIONAL COMPETITION FOR THE NEXT 2 YEARS), BUT HE GETS NO PUNISHMENT FROM MLB. THE SILVER LINING NOW IS THAT HE CAN HELP HIS MANAGER LOU PINIELLA LEARN THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN STEROIDS AND "REEFER."
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